Midnight gods

Midnight darkness
I am writing, and I feel gods
Are talking through me

Morning grey
And I realize it was just me.

By Markku Parviainen


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A clown of the county

Same old story
All the lost opportunities
Just because I couldn’t show real me
But who is real in this insane world?

Today I feel like the king of the world
Tomorrow clown of the county

Today everyone is celebrating with me
Tomorrow they are spitting on me

Why should I show my true face?
Because I can hide behind a clown’s makeup

When night arrives
I can remove my makeup and your contempt.

And move on.

By Markku Parviainen


Everything hurts
I have to stand up
New nightmares

More pain
Everything hurts
I had to stand up
I had to face the enemy
Otherwise, I will disappear

More pain
Everything hurts
This is bottom
I have been here before
Nothing new

Just raise up and fight
I am a fighter

Numb your feelings
Ignore the pain
Just keep moving

Still pain
Everything hurts

But I can see you tonight
And there will be a light

I am a fighter
That’s enough.

By Markku Parviainen


Being weird should be the new normal

Sometimes, I feel that we all are a bit weird and messed up. We just pretend to be normal. Some people are just better pretenders than others.

A true person is willing to accept his or her flaws and either fix them or accept them as strengths. Because what you might think as a flaw, someone else will think that it is your greatest strength!

But being weird and different is always better than being normal and boring.


I am a great pretender and my car troubles

We had problems with our car, and of course, I had to show my wife that I know something about fixing a car.

I went and opened the hood. I looked inside and I pretended I know what I was doing.

In reality, I didn’t have any clue!

(My brother and father are good with cars, but they were not around).

I touched some cables and hoped that some miracle will happen.


Finally, I told my wife that we have issues with electronics, but I don’t have the tools to fix it so it will be better if we call a mechanic.

OK, I lied a little…I didn’t have any clue what was going on!

I think my wife knows the truth.

A lesson my child taught me

Yesterday, my oldest son was wearing two different colors of socks. First, I mentioned about it, but then he stopped me with one question.

“I don’t care, does it matter?”

Honestly, I couldn’t really answer him, so I just told him that he is right. You decide what you should wear.

Why should we let the outside world define what we are, and what we are wearing?

Why can’t we be free from what others might think about us?

A true person should be free from others’ opinions and judgment.