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A clown of the county

Same old story
All the lost opportunities
Just because I couldn’t show real me
But who is real in this insane world?

Today I feel like the king of the world
Tomorrow clown of the county

Today everyone is celebrating with me
Tomorrow they are spitting on me

Why should I show my true face?
Because I can hide behind a clown’s makeup

When night arrives
I can remove my makeup and your contempt.

And move on.

By Markku Parviainen

I am a great pretender and my car troubles

We had problems with our car, and of course, I had to show my wife that I know something about fixing a car.

I went and opened the hood. I looked inside and I pretended I know what I was doing.

In reality, I didn’t have any clue!

(My brother and father are good with cars, but they were not around).

I touched some cables and hoped that some miracle will happen.

Nothing!

Finally, I told my wife that we have issues with electronics, but I don’t have the tools to fix it so it will be better if we call a mechanic.

OK, I lied a little…I didn’t have any clue what was going on!

I think my wife knows the truth.

A lesson my child taught me

Yesterday, my oldest son was wearing two different colors of socks. First, I mentioned about it, but then he stopped me with one question.

“I don’t care, does it matter?”

Honestly, I couldn’t really answer him, so I just told him that he is right. You decide what you should wear.

Why should we let the outside world define what we are, and what we are wearing?

Why can’t we be free from what others might think about us?

A true person should be free from others’ opinions and judgment.

With age, comes wisdom?

With age, comes wisdom!

It’s bullshit!

I still do the same mistakes as I used to. For example, sometimes with my workout, I forget to do a proper warm-up, and then, of course, I will pay a price!

Or I think I am still in my twenties, and start pushing hard with my work out!

And in the next two days, I will be unable to walk!

Friday evening, I will take a lot of wine, and my Saturday will be ruined because of a terrible hangover.

Sunday evening, I will buy extra-large pizza, and there goes my diet!

I am over 50 now and I still haven’t learned!

Does Age really come with wisdom?

What about you?

Life on your own terms and why most people can’t do it?

I admit. I can’t live a so-called normal life. The last time I had a normal job was sometime in the late eighties. I have taken many risks, I have traveled a lot, and because I had an open mind, I met many wonderful people around the world.

I like to work with my own schedule and I like to have the freedom to choose the people around me.

I don’t need any negativity around me. We have just one life, and I prefer to experience life on my own terms.

Of course, it’s not always easy, but life can be hard anyway, so is it better to live your life with your own rules?

Whisper in the dark

Whisper in the dark

I whisper
Please go away
Otherwise, I won’t stop

You whisper
Come now
I am here
I will make you feel again

I whisper
Please go away
If I start again
I won’t’ stop
I can’t follow that road again

You whisper
Come just one more time
You need me

I whisper
Please go away
I am too weak

No more
Never again

But I know it’s a lie

From Tales from my Dark side by Markku Parviainen

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Hello Darkness

IMG_6260

Hello darkness

You are still here
I can see you now
You were away a long time
But now you came back

I admit
I missed you
Sometimes it’s easy to be with you

You know me
You understand me
But if you stay here
I can’t go back

So my old friend
Farewell until we will see again

Goodbye darkness
Tales from my Dark Side by Markku Parviainen